May 12th, 2012
This is Part 2 of a tw0 part post. If you missed Part 1, please use the series link above to read it. In Part 1, we covered types of anger, anger’s effects on family relationships and your spiritual life, and more.
6. Other Various Negative Effects
Here are some proverbs that express other negative residual effects from anger:
Leads to evil responses. Ps. 37:8 – Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret– it leads only to evil.
Produces strife and reduces the honor of your reputation. Pr. 20:3 – It is to a man’s honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel. P. 30:33 – For as churning the milk produces butter, so stirring up anger produces strife.
Keeps you from acting in wisdom and self-control. Pr. – 29:11 A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control. Ecc. 7:9 – Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.
7. God Encourages Us to Get Rid of Anger.
It is interesting, here, that the list of things to eliminate from our lives are things are usually all associated with anger, or result from anger.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice (Eph. 4:31).
But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips (Col. 3:8).
When one is in a state of anger, your mind races, imagining all the things you want to say or do to the person Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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May 9th, 2012
Anger is an area in which we all can improve. Realizing the residual effects on our spirits and relationships can be motivational.
A reader recently asked about the effects on anger on one’s spiritual life. Let me clarify that we are not referring to the type of anger one feels over injustice, but rather the type that involves fury, rage, bitterness, and malice [ill-will]. As anger effects one’s interpersonal relationships as well as your spirit, let’s take a look at both aspects in this tw0-part post.
1. First, Realize that Anger Over Injustice is not Evil Even by God’s Standards.
Some people feel guilty over any type of anger. This is not correct. We should feel anger over injustice, as it causes us to protect ourselves and those who cannot protect themselves. Jesus Himself experienced anger over injustice. “He looked around at them in anger and, deeply distressed at their stubborn hearts (Mk. 3:5).” However, even anger over injustice needs to eventually return to Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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May 4th, 2012
Intestinal damage caused by food allergies can be a trigger for your intestinal diseases, such as Crohn’s Disease, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, and Celiac Disease.
I came across a study by Dr. Harry K. Wong that has beneficial insights on how food allergies can cause intestinal diseases due to the intestinal track damage they create over time. The article made a great deal of sense considering the people I know with these ailments have not found relief from conventional medical treatments. If one’s intestinal disease is food allergy triggered, then the problem would continue without relief until the food allergies are dealt with.
Be aware that many people are unaware of any allergic reaction to food allergies.
In my own experience, I discovered that a person can have food allergy reactions and not notice a reaction. Over time, especially when there has been has been an overload of stimulus from an allergen, the body stops reacting to it in a noticeable way. My doctor explained it to me this way. The first time you put a ring on, your mind is consciously aware of the feeling. Eventually, because of the constant stimulation of those nerves, the body tunes it out. Those nerves are still working, still being affected by the pressure of the ring, but you are mentally unaware of it. Dr. Wong also discusses that your immune system can be so overwhelmed by the allergen that it’s literally giving up Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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April 29th, 2012
Not only identifying but also releasing underlying causes of anger and resentment are a necessary part of personal growth.
Fellow SelfGrowth.com expert, Cassandra Lee– speaker, coach, and author– posted an article describing her personal technique of dealing with resentment and anger. I wanted to share a few excerpts from the article with you as well as give you a link to the full article.
Ms. Lee describes the need to analyze your actions, discover the source, and confront the issue at hand for resolution.
In her article, Ms. Lee describes a situation with a friend that caused her anger and resentment. The friend was unaware that his actions created these negatives, but in Ms. Lee’s mind, the situation grew until, when she saw him 2 days later, she treated him so coldly that they did not speak to each other for a month. This is a quote about her technique to deal with resentment and anger: Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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April 26th, 2012
Studies show that lowering your intake of sugars and grains plays a major role in slowing aging and extending lifespan.
In one of his newsletter articles, Dr. Joseph Mercola explained the results of these different studies. Use this link here or the footnote at the end of the post to read his full article.
The key factor resulting from the studies that Dr. Mercola brings out is that it is the lowering of insulin levels as a result of calorie restriction which helps to extend one’s life.
Calorie restriction equals lower insulin levels. On the reverse side, high insulin levels speed up the aging process. Though eating fewer calories overall does affect most people’s longevity, even more important is Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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April 22nd, 2012
Dr. Henry Cloud, PhD, one of my favorite authors, is a frequent guest speaker for the Family Series event hosted by Bill Hybel. There are some excerpts of one of his talks. Dr. Cloud is a noted psychologist and author of “Boundaries,” “How to Get a Date Worth Keeping,” and “Safe People.” You can listen or watch the full talk by Dr. Cloud at this link (Part VI on their page).
This is a continuation of a 2 part post. If you missed Part 1, use the above series link.
These are paraphrased excerpts from Dr. Cloud’s question and answer session on some of life’s toughest relationship questions. Please use the link below to watch or listen to the full video or audio. The insights will greatly benefit yourself, your friends, and family.
5. With regard to blended families and step families, how can a parent continue a close relationship with a child who is living with the other re-married parent and both parental roles are already being fulfilled in the child’s life?
This is a painful scenario and there is no way to go through this without feeling some loss. However, the first important step is to remove from your thoughts the concept of “either/or” because you are both in the child’s life. You don’t have control of when you are not there, but you do have 100% control of the relationship you have when you are together with your child. First, if you are nurturing, warm, and positive and do great stuff together, yet have requirements and expectations that he live by your rules, even if the other parent is a non-structure type, kids deep down eventually gravitate toward structure. You will face fights and some “prodigal son” moments, but continue to be the best person you can be in regards to loving and discipline. The child will develop an attachment to you based on that.
The second important point is don’t poison the other relationship with the step parent or the one with your ex. You want the child to have as many Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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April 20th, 2012
Dr. Henry Cloud, PhD, one of my favorite authors, is a frequent guest speaker for the Family Series event hosted by Bill Hybel. There are some excerpts of one of his talks. Dr. Cloud is a noted psychologist and author of “Boundaries,” “How to Get a Date Worth Keeping,” and “Safe People.” You can listen or watch the full talk by Dr. Cloud at this link (Part VI on their page).
Here are some paraphrased excerpts from Dr. Cloud’s question and answer session on some of life’s toughest relationship questions. We’ll do this in a 2 part post. Please use the link below to watch or listen to the full video or audio.
1. Where do you draw the line between tough love and unconditional love?
There is a problem with this term of “drawing the line.” When we look at God’s personality, His expectations are done in ways that are perfectly loving and honest so He never has to “draw the line” due to having gone too far down an enabling, co-dependent road. With parents, too often we have let the child go too long down a path without consequences until it is at a point where harm will come to them if he (or she does) not get control of himself. It should never get to this point, but if it does, it should be done in a loving way.
As for child discipline, in this culture people often say, “Don’t say ‘No’ to your child; give them choices.” As an adult, one runs into ‘No’s,’ with speed limits, job requirements, etc. Our job as parents is to arrange situations in a way that when they make good decisions then good things happen and when they make bad decisions bad things happen. The goal is to transfer self control to the child. They should grow to the point of being in charge of themselves and feeling, “Oh, I better do it this way so something uncomfortable does not happen.” …we must take a stance that requires them to step into maturity so they are in control and we can finally delegate that job to them.
2. How do you address character issues in marriage? How do you let a spouse know you want more from a relationship without making them feel like a bad spouse?
In response to the first part of the question, most problems are the same in every marriage whether or not it is a good marriage, unless something strange is going on. It is how it is handled that makes the difference. Research shows that you can predict divorce in couples by 90% accuracy if couples (1) are judgmental, critical in giving feedback to each other instead of problem solving and (2) if they have a lot of contempt for the spouse. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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April 14th, 2012
I came across some great encouragement for those struggling with broken hearts, oppression, and bruised spirits.
In my area of work, I come across many people in emotional pain created by a wide variety of circumstances. Each of us, at some point during life, go through periods when we feel oppressed, almost crushed by the weight of the circumstances. In Scripture, Paul talked about his feelings in such circumstances,
We are pressed on every side, yet not crushed; perplexed, yet not to despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, yet not destroyed. (2Cor.4:8)
Since we each face “crushing” circumstances at times, it would definitely be beneficial to be able to go through them as Paul did, not denying the gravity of the situation, but not allowing the situation to destroy him emotionally. Paul’s faith, or hope, kept him from losing heart in trying times. Faith is defined in Scripture as not only believing God exists, but that He responds positively to those who seek Him. (Heb.11:6)
It is knowledge of the nature of God that gives one hope during times of brokenness or oppression.
It is the difference between knowing without a doubt that someone cares about you and what is taking place, especially Someone with greater abilities and resources, as opposed to feeling there is no one to care at all. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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April 11th, 2012
Probiotics are a popular health supplement. How do you know which ones and how much to take?
Most of us have probably used acidophilus supplements, or more specifically, lactobacillus acidophilus. However, now there are more choices of probiotics on the market than ever, in a wide variety of price ranges, and in an even greater variation of bacteria amounts. Does it really matter which you take?
You will want to make an informed decision based on your personal need, such as are you wanting to just supplement a basically healthy digestive tract, or are you wanting a supplement to relieve and heal digestive issues. I have used plain L acidophilus as well as some inexpensive probiotic combinations from Walmart. If you have tried them, you, too, probably noticed an overall good experience of just feeling that your stomach is more settled, digesting easier, and less bloated after eating. These simple inexpensive types are fine for those who feel that their digestion is healthy.
Why would someone with good digestion want to take any probiotics at all?
As the digestive enzymes that occur naturally in foods are mostly destroyed by cooking, and many cultures eat too high a percentage of cooked food to maintain a good level of natural probiotic intake solely from food, a simple supplement is helpful. However, if you or a family member have consistent bloating, constipation, inconsistently formed bowel movements, yeast buildup, ulcers, or consistent gut pain after eating, you will want to implement the information I recently came across.
Though 1 million bacteria per pill sounds like a huge amount, these typical doses are not sufficient if you are having digestive issues.
Experts in probiotics say that you need a 10 billion bacteria per day probiotic intake to achieve Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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April 7th, 2012
Reading Level: Leisurely
When you look at your life, is your lifestyle one of true enjoyment, solely maintenance, or survivable chaos?
I recently mentioned about the need to “plan for life,” especially when life’s responsibilities appear to be squeezing your dreams out of the picture and life becomes solely a process of maintenance. However, I have been reminded how easy it is for people to believe their lifestyles are intended to be chaotic to be fulfilling.
My spouse has done business in the past with a couple whose lives are in a constant state of chaos — by choice. The one person’s personality lends to feeling that this state of chaos is necessary for a fulfilling life. Both of them, being in a religious environment, either consciously or subconsciously believe that this state of “chaos” is a matter of religious sacrifice or higher calling. Working in religious fields, I’ve seen this concept too often in religious people, and unknowingly lived by that philosophy myself in my 20’s and 30’s. The effects of this barely tolerable lifestyle are already becoming visible in their kids and in poor business decisions, as time for restful meditation is lacking.
If your lifestyle is not one of true enjoyment, the mental perspective needs to be engrained that a healthy, restful way of life is intended by design and necessary for fulfillment. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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April 1st, 2012
Reading Level: Impassioned
How much does guilt and self rejection hold you back from what is most important to you in life?
Do guilty feelings keep you from confidence, happiness, and success? Feelings of guilt or self rejection will usually hold you back from most of what you desire out of life unless you choose to change those mindsets and bring restoration to your confidence and self esteem.
I have been enjoying a book by Brennan Manning called, Abba’s Child; it was a recent gift from a friend. In the beginning of the book, he discusses his own path to overcoming shame and self rejection. He is aware that his own past experiences are so common in the human experience that many people will benefit from the results of his journey to self acceptance and value.
One of the main behaviors that cause a person to live with guilt and self rejection is the habit of projecting his or her feelings of self onto God.
The emotional weight is great when one feels shame or self disapproval of past choices, decisions, or just the person that you are. How much greater is that weight when one convinces himself that his Heavenly Father, his Creator, the most phenomenal being in the universe thinks all the same negative, condemning thoughts about him? Yet, this is a typical thought pattern in the human experience, though we are usually unaware that this is what we are doing.
Usually included in these projected thoughts is the idea that life’s good and bad times signal God’s approval or rejection.
As Manning says, it is easy to feel loved by God when life is going well, all your support systems are in place Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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March 29th, 2012
Results from a 14 yr long study shows only 2 or more soft drinks a week increased the risk of pancreatic cancer by 87%.
The study by the University of Minnesota was done on 60,000 people in Singapore and published this month in the journal Cancer Epidemiology, Biomarkers & Prevention. As Singapore is a wealthy country with excellent health care, doctors believe that the results readily apply to other industrialized nations. It appears that as insulin is made in the pancreas, soda interferes with insulin levels, then contributing to cancerous cell growth in the pancreas. Similarly, diabetes, a disease in which the body’s insulin production is compromised, is also known to increase pancreatic cancer risk.
Natural sugar in fruit juice did not create the same cancer risk.
Dr. Mark Pereira, the study’s lead researcher, believes a possible explanation is that soda drinkers usually have other poor health habits which also increase their risk level, such as smoking and eating red meat, two lifestyle factors already linked to cancer.
230,000 people are diagnosed each year with pancreatic cancer.
The American Cancer Society estimates that only 5% survive for 5 years. Identifying risk factors Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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March 25th, 2012
Reading Level: Gratifying
Each of us desires a long, abundant life with our loved ones. Yet, do your daily decisions work for or against that desire?
These past 2 months have been one of those seasons of life that come to all of us. Tomorrow is a funeral for a friend that died suddenly and unexpectedly. Another friend has been in ICU for weeks. The first person had lived a life that was very abusive to his physical health for years, having just made a change in the recent past. The other friend has lived the more typical unhealthy life of too many sodas and mostly processed foods. She has had many health issues that have drastically affected her family and friends for the whole past year and has now been in ICU for a good part of 2 months and still has life-threatening issues going on. Both should have had a good 20 to 30 more years of living an abundant life, loving life and loving family, but the choice of poor daily health habits stole the precious gift of long abundant life not only from them, but from their friends and families.
We need to be reminded of how essential the little daily choices regarding health-food, sleep, exercise-are truly the ultimate decision for a long life.
Every day that you get up, you make seemingly insignificant choices regarding what you eat, whether or not you skip exercise, how you deal with stress, if you get enough sleep. These decisions come so frequently that one usually makes them almost without thinking. Each little decision not to do what is beneficial to your physical health is, in actuality, a decision of whether or not to embrace a long abundant life, with time to live life, enjoying and loving your family and friends, and giving them the gift of that time to love you and enjoy your presence on this earth. Isn’t that what each of us want? Yet it seems so easy to choose otherwise. There is a quote worth remembering, Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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March 21st, 2012
What area in your life do you desire to see be completely revolutionized? Your career? Your family life? Your health? Your finances?
Recently I was doing a study on Ephesians 3:20, one of my favorite verses,
“Now to God Who, by consequence of the action of His power that is at work within you, is able to carry out His purpose and do superabundantly, far over and above all that you dares ask or think, infinitely beyond your highest prayers, desires, thoughts, hopes, or dreams. (Amp)
The main phrase in the Greek is more accurately translated “superabundantly above the greatest abundance.” Let your mind try to fully fathom that concept. Whatever your need, whatever your desire Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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March 18th, 2012
If you are a giver and your giving has left yourself in need, it is time to re-prioritize.
In actuality, all the people you love, those that you have expended yourself to help and sacrificed your own well-being, will be better off after you re-focus on self help! This article by fellow SelfGrowth.com professional, Lori Snyder, covers 10 basic steps for getting back to daily care for yourself.
Lori admits that she herself was so busy with everyone else’s needs that she sidelined her own needs, only to discover that the reality was, by neglecting her own needs and not meeting them first, she was not able to give her best to those she loves. These are brief excerpts from Ms. Snyder’s article. Use the link in the footnote below to read the full article.
1. Start each day filled with gratitude for all that you are…Appreciate the beauty all around you. [I would suggest, at the beginning, to make a list of self appreciation points. If you’ve neglected yourself for a long time, it will be difficult at the beginning to really focus on your own value.]
2. Count your blessings for the people who you love and who love you…They all come, and some go, for a reason.
3. Take a moment of silence for yourself to meditate, and think about what your needs of the day are, and what you would like to accomplish.
4. Be mindful of your health, and incorporate a wellness schedule into your week. Exercise, eat healthy, get enough rest.
5. Look at your goals sheet quickly each week, and evaluate how you are doing with them. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »
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