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Resentment not dealt with is a roadblock to emotional and physical healing.

Resentment usually results from a lack of dealing with conflicts. This doesn’t necessarily mean you must resolve the conflict with the other person; sometimes, that isn’t possible, especially if the person is volatile or hostile. However, you must deal with your feelings toward the past conflict in your own mind. As will be mentioned later in this post, emotional and physical ailments result from not coming to terms with past events and dealing with your resentment.

The first step in ridding yourself of resentment is to own up to your own choices.

As the old saying goes, “It takes two to tangle.” By admitting to the mistakes you made in the situation, it enables you to stop the blame game-to stop your focus of solely blaming the other person for your problems. This does not condone the other person’s harmful behavior toward you. This does not mean that you pretend that such behavior is wrong. However, instead of being focused on solely blaming the other person, you take responsibility for your own poor choices. For example, maybe you chose to get into an abusive relationship by ignoring the warning signs. Or, maybe the conflict arose because you insisted on discussing a difficult topic when you knew the other person was too tired or ill. Or, if you are a compliant dealing with a controlling person, you need to admit that you “allowed” the other person to control you and did something that you later resented when, instead, you should have set boundaries by refusing to do what you knew was not in your best interest. If your resentment stems from being over-giving to loved ones or over-involved in a good cause, again you need to Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Very Impassioned

By the most basic definition, a compliant person melts into the demands and needs of other people to avoid the conflicts that would arise if he stood up for his own needs and desires.

We had a post a few weeks ago in answer to readers’ questions called, “Recognizing a Controlling Person.” Since then, readers have asked for clarification on the opposite personality type/boundary problem called compliant personality/compliance. There are obviously more than 2 personality types in the world, but among family, friends, and acquaintances, these 2 types seem to be very apparent, especially since opposites attract.

A compliant personality often leaves a person feeling defenseless against the demands of others and frustrated by the lack of fulfilling his own desires. A compliant person is unable to say “No” when a controlling person’s demands are unreasonable, against his own conscience, or hindering the progress of his own goals and the fulfillment of his own needs. Controlling people recognize a compliant person and easily manipulate him to conform to whatever the controller’s demands are by the use of guilt, manipulating circumstances, or even verbal or physical abuse.

When a compliant needs to say “No” to someone, a large number of fears typically make him incapable of doing so. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Very Impassioned

The emotions created by a lack of healing often cause people to ask this question. Yet God even calls Himself by a healing name.

God uses many different names throughout Scripture to describe Himself and assist us in understanding His characteristics. They were used as names in the original language, though when translated they often appear as more of a phrase. Some examples are: God Almighty, God our Righteousness, God our Provider, God our Peace, Redeemer, Savior, King of Kings, Father God, and many more. In Exodus 15:26, God says, “I am Yahovah Rapha’,” which is translated in English, “I am the Lord who heals you.” A direct translation is the “Self-Existent or Eternal One who cures, heals as a physician, repairs, thoroughly makes whole.” To help us understand Him clearly, God identifies Himself as the One who thoroughly heals us. His desire is that our healing is not solely physical, but in every aspect of our lives. [This post is a continuation of a healing discussion the day prior called, "Why Doesn't God Heal Me?" You will want to read that post first if you have not, as this post will mainly go through quotes showing God's willingness to heal.] Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Very Impassioned

Since the majority of Jesus’ 3 year ministry on earth consisted of healing people’s physical ailments, in addition to delivering from demonic forces and preaching, it is a continual question in this day and age, where is healing now?

Scripture expresses that Jesus’ life revealed the will of God for us. Since His ministry on earth consisted of bringing restoration to people’s lives physically, emotionally, and spiritually, it would naturally follow that this is still God’s desire. There are many verses that speak of God’s desire to heal; one of God’s names for Himself is even “The Lord our Healer,” as translated into English, though we will cover those in the next post.

In part of my own personal search as to why there is presently such a great lack of physical healing through prayer, I have put much time into studying people who have been known to be unusually effective in prayers for supernatural healing. In this post, I would you to share with you one of the most phenomenal healings I’ve ever read and the principles of healing by which this great man of faith lived.

Healing does take place in even the most deadly diseases.

John G. Lake was a missionary to South Africa from 1908 to 1913. While there, a horrific bubonic plague broke out. John Lake was caring for the sick and burying the dead. Britain sent a ship of medical supplies and a corps of doctors to him. The doctors asked Lake how he had protected himself from the deadly plague. His answer was, “I believe ‘the law of the Spirit of life has set me free from the law of sin and death (Rom.8:2).’ As long as I walk in the light of that law [of the Spirit of life], no germ will attach itself to me.” In scriptural context, this verse speaks of Jesus’ work of salvation bringing the life of the Spirit of God to us and freeing us from “the law of sin” or, in other words, from everything evil that came into the world through sin, such as disease, poverty, addictions, spiritual death, and early physical death. The doctors were unconvinced, so Lake insisted they do a microscopic experiment on him. Lake showed them that if one of them took bubonic plague foam from the lungs of a dead person and put it under a microscope, Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Another New Feature has been added to make ReceiveHealing.com a better place for you to surf to health and healing–the Article Archives!

You will see the Article Archives in the blue bar on the top right of each site page. It is also listed under the Categories in the right column. Most blogs do not have a good way to browse through past posts other than using the Search Box, and if you don’t use the exact term as the author, you don’t find what you need.

The Article Archives shows you a complete list of all prior posts.

I’ve been careful to title posts according to topic, rather than using catchy phrases. So take a look! Find posts on topics of interest to you, find posts on topics that relate to your healing needs, or email some posts to a friend in need! Remember, you can also use the Listen Now feature to download articles to your laptop, desktop, iPod, or MP3.

Enjoy and Receive Health and Healing in Your Life Now!

Reading Level: Gratifying

In most realms of religion, there seems to be a prevalent concept that poverty makes a person more pious.

The added deduction from this concept is that God sends poverty on His people to teach them or purify them. There are several possible reasons for the development of this line of thought. First, difficulty does often cause a person to reach out to God, to someone greater than himself, resulting in character growth. Hence, people assume God sent it. Scripture actually says that God works to bring good out of evil done to us (Gen. 50:20; Deut. 23:5; Rom. 8:28). A second possible reason for the development of this poverty concept is the misquoting of the Scripture about money. Scripture actually says that the “love” of money leads to all kinds of evil, not wealth itself.

God expresses that poverty is destructive to people, a trait contrary to God’s nature.

Though more examples could be given, these two make it clear that poverty is not a type of “learning tool” sent by God. God says,

• Poverty is the ruin of the poor (NIV). [Another translation-] The destruction of the poor is their poverty (NKJV Pr. 10:15).
• [The context of this quote is speaking about laziness...] and poverty will come on you like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man making you helpless (AMP).

In contrast to the idea of poverty being from God, the traits of ruin, destruction, and other harm are listed in Scripture as having their origin in satan. Pay particular attention to Jesus’ description of the contrasting life God gives. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

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In spite of the wave of interest in the Law of Attraction philosophy that is going on in recent years, many people still struggle over whether or not there is truth in the concept of the Power of Your Words.

If you have Googled the Law of Attraction recently, or even searched through the Experts at SelfGrowth.com (Their Experts are 1000′s of people whose careers focus on various types of self-improvement. I have a webpage there connecting to this site under the Spirituality category.), you will find scores of people in the secular realm who say that they were bankrupt and had lost everything only to have it restored by following the principles of the Law of Attraction. This philosophy is based on a quote by Jesus, though most of the people who appear to use it benefit from the Scriptural principle of the power of their words apart from any close relationship with God. In other words, the power of speaking positively over the needs, goals, and desires of your life to the point that it changes your thought patterns is such a powerful natural and spiritual law that putting it into practice has even turned around the lives of people who do not seek close association with God. It has turned destitute lives to states of healthy lives physically, relationally, and financially.

Let’s briefly look at the basic principle of how positive words create a healthy chain reaction in your life.

When your thoughts are consistently focused on the negative state of various situations in your life, several things occur: Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Very Impassioned

How do we recognize controlling people to stop the infringement of personal boundaries?

This is in response to a reader’s question. People with compliant personalities ( basically a personality that feels guilty for standing up for itself) are often “run over” in life by people with controlling personalities. Often the compliant person doesn’t even realize why he, or she, struggles with so much guilt and resentment, guilt for not wanting to do what the controller says and resentment for giving in and doing what is against his own conscience or goals. Since a compliant personality feels compelled by guilt to give in to the aggression or manipulation of the controller, he doesn’t always even realize that the other person is creating these problems. Other times a compliant does realize it, but just doesn’t have the emotional strength to stand up to the person. A compliant person must learn to deal with his or her own weaknesses and the lack of determination to stand up for his boundaries; he must determine to be true to the person that he is and how he wants to live his life, making his own decisions and taking responsibility for them. I needed to give you that background on the compliant personality to understand the relationship between a controller and a compliant. However, since the reader question was on identifying controllers, that will be the focus today. My definitions of the 2 types of controlling people and other illustrations are taken from Cloud and Townsend’s “Boundaries” book, pp. 54-55. Full book information is at the end of the post.

Controllers are people who cannot hear a “No” answer.

The example Cloud and Townsend use is of the phrase common to sales training, “No” means “Maybe” and “Maybe” means “Yes.” This attitude can make an effective salesman, but it is quite harmful to personal relationships. The primary problem of a controller who refuses to accept another person telling him, “No,” is that he is refusing to take responsibility for his own life. He is continually controlling others in various ways to convince them to take care of responsibilities in life that he should be taking care of himself. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

A couple of readers asked about health problems stemming from past hurts and how positive thinking brings healing, so let’s touch on both today!

There is an endless stream of little things happening everyday which can irritate you if you allow them to, but they are not even worth the negative thoughts and resulting physical consequences.

The first main point here is “little!” For most of us, it is allowing little situations to consistently irritate or worry us that ruin our health. Medical studies have shown that up to 80% of physical illnesses are caused by emotional issues. Some of us may be experiencing health problems due to living in an emotionally and/or physically abusive environment; if that is the case, health cannot come without a change “in” the environment or “of” environments. (If this is your case, please go to the Cloud Tag in the side column and click on “boundary violations” for posts to help you with that type of situation.) The majority of us, however, allow our health to be ruined by instances that actually come down to a matter of our own choice of thoughts. We can be the cause of our own poor health by allowing a multitude of small instances throughout the day to create irritation or anger or worry. Because we allow these negative responses so often, harmful chemicals such as cortisol are continually being released into our bodies. Studies show that cortisol, a chemical released by stress, increases irritability, depression, anxiety, insomnia, and is associated with numerous diseases (1).

The little things that set you off will vary with your personality. For example, what negative thoughts come to mind when: Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

There were several questions submitted by readers which have helpful replies and discussion already made available in previous posts. Today we’re going to go through 7 Reader Submitted Questions and give you the links to the articles provided to help bring healing to those emotional or spiritual life issues.

1. How to Forgive Yourself
   Healing by Forgiving Yourself
   Hold on to Forgiveness Instead of Failure
   
2. How to Deal with Emotional Pain from Betrayal
   Hope for the Betrayed Heart
   Not Allowing Hurt to Stay Central Focus
   
3. Recognizing Love or When a Person Truly Loves You
   Recognizing Real Love Part 1
   Recognizing Real Love Part 2
   Defining Harmful Behavior
   A Love that Isn’t Earned
   Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

This is the fifth article in our series in answer to Readers’ Questions.

First, since God is the source of love, focus on demonstrating His characteristics to those in crisis.

For some of us this will be easier than others, depending on your knowledge of God’s character. If you grew up in a religious culture of misinformation that portrayed God as unforgiving, unkind, basically inhumane, you may not have as much knowledge in that area to draw from. You may want to read through or listen to some of my previous posts on that topic, such as, “Healing by an Understanding of God’s Love” and “A Love that Isn’t Earned.” God describes Himself as compassionate, gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, having mercy (undeserved favor) that is everlasting, forgiving, patient, comforting, encouraging, protective; this is just a partial list. These characteristics of God are all traits that each of us need in our lives. We were created with the need to receive these emotional, spiritual, relational exchanges with God. In the same way, we were also created with the need to share or live out these character traits with each other. Usually, life is so busy that pouring these traits of God into each other’s lives gets set aside. It is worth mentioning that most all of us need to restructure our lives so as to have the time to consistently invest in this valuable and necessary exchange with each other, but we most certainly must focus on expressing God’s loving aspects with those who are in crisis. If you are already in the habit of living this way, it will be easier, but if your life has been too busy and you’ve neglected fine tuning these traits, God will still help you and honor your efforts to bless the person in crisis by living out His loving characteristics to them in their time of need. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Impassioned

In continuation of our series, this is another reader provided question. I wasn’t sure if the person was asking about God’s love or human love, so I thought we’d cover both aspects.

First, let’s focus on a general principle of love. Love, whether given freely or earned, can be damaged or destroyed depending on our responses to it.

Someone can choose to love you completely unearned or unmerited, such as with new emotional love, which is based on the person they hope you to be, since they haven’t been acquainted with you long enough to actually know what you are like so as to commit to the relationship rationally. If your actions are unloving, selfish, and/or inconsiderate, obviously that will damage that relationship and eventually destroy the unmerited love as you demonstrate more and more that you are unworthy of it. Emotionally or physically harmful behavior will destroy it even more quickly.

Love that is earned in human relationship is actually, per say, more stable.

It may begin as emotional love or acquaintance or friendship and develop into a stable, lasting love as your attitudes and behavior show over time that you can be trusted to be a loving person through the variety of life’s circumstances. This is what I term rational love, a love in which the person has a sound basis of long-term experience with you which has developed a high level of trust. This trust based on experience then provides Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

A reader asked, “Define harmful behavior.” There are many ways one can define or recognize the harmful behavior of others in your life, or even behavior of your own that is harmful to others or yourself, but the easiest way is to evaluate the results.

God says that real love does not do harm to another person, so living according to real love causes a person to completely obey all the laws of God due to living a loving lifestyle (Rom. 10:13). Thus, a person who truly loves you will not consistently live a lifestyle that brings harmful results in your life. Granted, we all lose our tempers at time and say or do things that later we have to apologize for, but the key difference is whether or not a person brings more harm than good.

Let’s take a look at how to evaluate behavior by the results. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

A reader recently asked, “How does God desire for us to handle abusive relationships?” I already have some other posts related to this topic such as recognizing real love and how to move forward after getting out of the situation which I will reference below.

Let’s cover now 6 specific steps important for anyone in an abusive relationship or trying to recover after one.

Forgive Yourself- Admit any mistakes you made in the situation. There are always mistakes on both sides. You may need to forgive yourself for getting into that relationship to begin with, especially, if in retrospect, you realize you ignored all the warning signs. Or, you may now see that you should have not waited so long to confront or abandon the relationship. Also, people often feel the need to forgive themselves for the valuable time that was lost while devoted to an unhealthy relationship.

Forget - Leave the past in the past. We all make decisions that we later regret. They cannot be changed, but we can keep from living under their shadow the rest of our lives. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

The first matter to overcome regarding a fear of God’s rejection is a concrete decision to replace feelings with truth.

Negative feelings about God most often stem from harmful relationships with authority figures in one’s past, such as parents, or from improper religious education during childhood. Authority figures may have misused their authority or shown a harsh form of discipline that was lacking in love and security. Or, some religious leaders present God has a harsh, unforgiving, unreachable person due to, not only some distortions regarding the character of God, but a failure to teach the full scope of God’s character. Contrary to such a presentation of God, His love and sense of justice are perfectly balanced. He does discipline us at times, but in ways that lovingly bring about our healing and restoration!

Negative feelings from childhood can be overcome, but accept the fact that it will take consistent effort since usually you are trying to correct decades of negative thought patterns.

When faced with certain situations that spur your desire to seek God, your mind will automatically follow the negative pattern of thoughts, fearing God’s rejection, as it has always done. You will need to be consistent in interrupting those automatic negative thought processes by repeatedly speaking truth to yourself and refusing to allow the emotions that are associated with those old thoughts until your present feelings line up with truth. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »