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How much do you live life in the present moment?  Or is your daily life a constant mental battle between past problems and future concerns?

I’ve mentioned that I’ve been reading again through Dr. Richard Carlson’s book, “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff.”  I wasn’t going to make another reference to it but then I came across the chapter on being present-minded or “living on purpose,” as author, Dawna Markova, also challenges.  The tendency to not live present-minded is such a wide spread mental trap that most people unknowingly fall into — one which literally steals the joy out of life — that I could not deprive you of the opportunity to discuss it again. 

Listen to this quote from Dr. Carlson which aptly describes not living a present-minded life:

We allow past problems and future concerns to dominate our present moments, so much so that we end up anxious, frustrated, depressed, and hopeless.  On the flip side, we also postpone our gratification, our stated priorities, and our happiness, convincing ourselves that “someday” will be better than today.  While we’re busy Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Thomas Merton is well known for journaling spiritual meditations that have challenged countless people in bettering their daily lives and relationships with God and man. I enjoyed going through many of his quotes this week and wanted to share with you the ones related to:

• Self Esteem
• Forgiving Yourself
• Balance in Self Sacrifice and
• Rest

Merton on Self Esteem:

We cannot achieve greatness unless we lose all interest in being great. If we pay too much attention to [our idea of greatness], we will be lured out of the peace and stability…God gave us, and seek to live in a myth we have created for ourselves. We are truly ourselves when we lose the futile self consciousness that keep us constantly comparing ourselves with others in order to see how big we are.

We all seek to imitate one another’s imagined greatness….If I do not know who I am, it is because I think I am the sort of person everyone around me wants me to be. Perhaps I have never asked myself whether I wanted to become what everybody else seems to want to become. Perhaps if I only realized Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

Each of us desires a long, abundant life with our loved ones. Yet, do your daily decisions work for or against that desire?

These past 2 months have been one of those seasons of life that come to all of us. Tomorrow is a funeral for a friend that died suddenly and unexpectedly. Another friend has been in ICU for weeks. The first person had lived a life that was very abusive to his physical health for years, having just made a change in the recent past. The other friend has lived the more typical unhealthy life of too many sodas and mostly processed foods. She has had many health issues that have drastically affected her family and friends for the whole past year and has now been in ICU for a good part of 2 months. She almost died a couple of weeks ago and still has life-threatening issues going on. Both should have had a good 20 to 30 more years of living an abundant life, loving life and loving family, but the choice of poor daily health habits stole the precious gift of long abundant life not only from them, but from their friends and families.

We need to be reminded of how essential the little daily choices regarding health-food, sleep, exercise-are truly the ultimate decision for a long life.

Every day that you get up, you make seemingly insignificant choices regarding what you eat, whether or not you skip exercise, how you deal with stress, if you get enough sleep. These decisions come so frequently that one usually makes them almost without thinking. Each little decision not to do what is beneficial to your physical health is, in actuality, a decision of whether or not to embrace a long abundant life, with time to live life, enjoying and loving your family and friends, and giving them the gift of that time to love you and enjoy your presence on this earth. Isn’t that what each of us want? Yet it seems so easy to choose otherwise. There is a quote worth remembering, Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

Is your life focus right now on the main problem area of your life?

What is that controlling area? A job, finances, marriage, other personal relationships, health? Though we must give attention to the problem area if it is going to improve, it is healthier and more effective to be focused on completeness or wholeness than give the totality of your attention to a problem.

Since the beginning of creation, God’s desire for mankind is to be complete.

At the beginning of creation, all was in perfection and harmony. Everything mankind needed was readily available. Yes, man’s rebellion brought devastation, but God still desires for your life to return to a state of wholeness or completeness, and so should you.

Look at this greeting out of Scripture:

1Sam. 25:6 And say this, “May all be well for you: peace be to you and your house and all you have.”

We are to speak the desire for all to be well in others’ lives; certainly, we should speak and desire it over our own lives.

Let’s take a more in depth look with this quote:

Jer.33:9 They will be in awe and will tremble at the abundant prosperity and peace I provide.

God speaks here of people being in awe, both mentally and physically at the prosperity and peace He provides for His people. Sounds simple, but, as I’ve mentioned before, much is lost in the translation to English. Look at the depth and expanse of completeness in life (or wholeness — whichever term is easier for you to envision) that is intended to be ours: Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

Everyone desires to be in better control of achieving the life they desire.

I recently read a post by one of my favorite bloggers, Susan Hanshaw of Sanctuary for Change. Susan just turned 50 and did some re-evaluation which resulted in the realization that she wanted a different level of control in her life now than what she had experienced during her first 50 years.

Here is an excerpt from her post on “How to Take Control of Your Life” with 5 points to make you more effective in that area.

Use the link below to read Susan’s full post:

I pretty much let the energy of life pull me along for my first 50 years…Now I am feeling a lot more motivated to step in and take control. 

How do you take control of your life?

1. Acknowledge that your life needs the same kind of planning that you give your weekends. We all have a lot more power to create awesome lives than we recognize. It starts with direction.
2. Set aside time to focus on what you want to create with your life. Let dreams be born and believed in.
3. Begin every day focused on your vision. Recognize that your attention fuels whatever you focus on. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

Take a few moments to look at this example and write out the activities, people, and environment that will enable you to live your life with purpose.

This is Part 2 of this post. In Part 1, we talked about author Dawna Markova’s insight on Living with Purpose and looked at her “No Matter Whats” list which she developed as an example to help each of us write our own list of how to live lives with passion and purpose. If you did not read Part 1, please click here to read it.

Here is my “No Matter Whats” List:

What are the influences, activities, and people that cause me to live life with energy, fulfillment, and purpose?

No matter what, I need to be living and working in a spacious environment that encourages my creativity and visionary side.

No matter what, I need to be living and working in an environment with garden and ocean views that fill my body with pleasure, health, and energy.

No matter what, I need to live a lifestyle that provides times for prayer, meditation, healthy eating, exercise, relaxation, and friendship so that my mind, spirit, and body are all equally healthy.

No matter what, I need to work privately as an author, but also outwardly, impacting the world, so that all nations of the earth are blessed through me. (Gen.12:3) Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

Do you feel that you are living the purpose for which your life exists and enjoying achieving it with passion?   Or do you feel that you are powerless, caught in a habitual life that you do not want?

This past week my brother mentioned to me a book by Dawna Markova. He said she is known for encouraging people to surround themselves with the environment, people, and activities that bring energy into their lives, rather than drain energy from their lives. I have read articles by other authors on that topic, but none by Dawna, so I decided to Google her and find out more. Dawna Markova, Ph.D, is an internationally known speaker and author who encourages people to” learn from our wounds, find our gifts, celebrate our values, and live our dreams to live on purpose and with passion.” One of her most popular books is, “Wide Open: On Living With Purpose and Passion.” She has many other great sounding books, as well as a blog, which you can find at DawnaMarkova.com  .

I also came across an article of Ms. Markova’s called, “Landscape of the Soul.”  She has a great illustration of how one can be trapped in an unfulfilling life of habit. She tells of a science experiment in which baby fish were raised in a small glass tank that was inside a larger glass tank of adult fish. Once the baby fish were grown, the small tank was removed, but the baby fish still would not swim beyond the place where the walls of the small tank had once been. The habit was more real than reality, even though reality provided them with more freedom.

Are you living in a way that develops that best of who you are?

Ms Markova wisely instructs to give thought to the kind of environment you need to bring out the best of the person that you are so that, when you are in a needy, demanding environment, you will not lose your sense of self or purpose. Rather than accept the environment you have been given, or the habitual lifestyle you are in, contemplate and decide what environment, people, and activities you need so that you are living your life’s purpose and, thus, able to live life passionately because your life is purposeful. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

How firmly do you hold to the vision of your destiny when circumstances appear to be working against you?

We each want a clear path to our destinies; do you succumb to discouragement and doubt when you are unable to see the full path, or when people and situations keep saying, “It won’t happen!”?

First, it is necessary to be clear about your destiny.

Know your life’s purpose. Along life’s journey to fulfill that destiny, you have a wide variety of needs or goals you desire to reach, such as better health, more successful relationships or communication, freedom from debt, or career changes. These goals are important steps in fulfilling your destiny and the person you are meant to be. To avoid being swayed by doubts or opposition, you must first “know that you know” in your heart what your purpose for being is.

Second, you must determine to believe in your destiny.

No one else can believe it for you – a spouse or a parent – if you are going to withstand disappointments or setbacks. If you believe that this certain path or accomplishment truly is your destiny, then keep in mind during setbacks or opposition that you will get there! It was meant to be; it was destined or planned before you were born. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

An important principle of success is staying more focused on the goal than the present obstacles or even the steps to reaching it.

I was reminded of this principle while working toward the completion of all the necessary seasonal responsibilities in my garden. I have quite extensive gardens with a large variety of plants, including over 30 antique rose bushes. Though I have always enjoyed gardening, this time of year’s seasonal requirements get very overwhelming as it takes about 3 months to complete due to other life responsibilities. The care and upkeep is probably too extensive for this time in life, but, when we designed and planted it 15 years ago, it was not possible to foresee the changes in career, family responsibilities, and physical energy in the future. It is a temptation to cause myself continual displeasure by solely viewing all the tasks yet undone rather than staying focused on the forthcoming end result and enjoying the present pleasures my garden during the process of the oiling, fertilizing, pruning, and mulching to reach the goal; it will become a healthy, lush garden that is a delight to the eyes and a joy to share with friends and family.

Here are some results of staying more focused on the end goal than the present obstacles or process: Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

Your level of confidence is usually directly proportionate to the intensity of drive or motivation to reach your dreams.

We each have probably seen movies in which a main character discovers that he or she has a terminal illness and suddenly chooses to overcome any intimidation or other hindrance that has kept him from fulfilling all those dreams he had of things he wanted to experience in this life. 

Think of all the dreams you would like to achieve between this moment and the conclusion of your life on this earth.  What has held you back?  Sometimes there are financial considerations in play, but many times the hindrance is something as simple as a lack of self esteem; either you fear what other people would think if you did those things or you have fears regarding your abilities.

There is a good historical illustration how major life dreams can be accomplished in spite of one’s self esteem not being at its best.

Most of us are familiar with the account of Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

You can increase your discernment in business relationships and personal interactions through an understanding of the basic personality types.

(This is Part 3 in this Post. Please use the above links if you have not yet read Parts 1 and 2.) There are a couple of well-known charts or profiles that explain personality types. Becoming aware of the tendencies in other people’s personalities can help you discern more clearly, for example, which people tend to be manipulative or strong-willed, which would greatly affect your business dealings. Or, these profiles can also help you be more aware of your own tendencies so you know which personalities are more difficult for you to deal with in long-term relationships. I trust these 2 lists will increase your ability to have wisdom and discernment in your business and other interpersonal relationships.

This is a great definition from Emotional Competency.com explaining how the categorization of personality traits is beneficial to discernment.

Personality traits are intrinsic differences that remain stable throughout most of our life. They are the constant aspects of our individuality. Each individual behaves according to certain distinctive patterns throughout a variety of situations…Also, you have probably observed that these various behaviors stay with the person consistently over time and throughout a variety of circumstances. These persistent behavior patterns, called personality traits, are stable over time, consistent in a variety of situations, and differ from one individual to the next.(1)

This first list of 4 Personality Types is one of the most well-known and is commonly used for career planning or staff relations/management.

I found a great, simplified summary in a excerpt from a book by Tim Bryce for helping young adults adapt to the workplace. It sounds like a great book. See the footnote below for more info on Tim and his book. Here is Mr. Bryce’s summary of the 4 personality types using the letter system:

Type “A” Personality - Is a highly independent and driven personality, typically representing the leaders in business. They are blunt, competitive, no-nonsense types who like to get to the point. They are also strong entrepreneurial spirits (risk takers). As such, they embrace change and are always looking for practical solutions for solving problems.

Type “B” Personality - Represents highly extroverted people who love the spotlight. Because of this, they are very entertaining and possess strong charisma (everyone likes to be around them). Small wonder these people are sales and marketing types. They thrive on entertaining people and are easily hurt if they cannot sway someone. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

The ability to discern the character of the people with whom you do business or interact is essential for a clear path to success. 

In Part 1 of this series, we discussed how discernment is important to your life.  (If you missed Part 1, click here for Safety in Discernment or use the above Series link.)

Love Yourself Enough to Choose Discernment

How much do you love yourself?  The level of your desire for discernment may be proof.  There is a proverb that says,

He who gets wisdom loves his own soul; he who cherishes understanding (discernment) prospers. Pr. 19:8

Wisdom and discernment are connected, as we will see in a moment.  Your desire for wisdom proves how much you value yourself. When you desire discernment, you show that you value yourself enough to choose to bring prosperity to your life.  Most people have a natural love for themselves; their self-esteems might have room for improvement, but the innate desire for self preservation and a “life worth living” is there.  As scripture says, “No one hates his own body. On the contrary he nourishes and cherishes it (Eph 5:29).”  Evaluate your present life perspective to see if you are choosing a path that demonstrates love for yourself and your destiny.

Discernment is also a part of emotional/spiritual maturity.

We can observe in the natural realm how discernment is an aspect of emotional growth and maturity.  We admire those who have attained it, along with the stability and success it has brought their lives.  Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

An important part of your success in life is the ability to discern the character of the people with whom you do business or interact in other ways on a regular basis.

In spite of all your education, giftings, and hardwork to reach the goals and level of success in life that you desire, not discerning the character of the people with whom you do business or otherwise interact can quickly undermine the majority of your efforts and greatly hinder your path to success. 

My spouse and I have usually worked together in our careers and are visionaries, tending to be workaholics and overachievers.  We always want to see progress.  Some years back, at a crossroads in our lives, a person wisely pointed out to us a main source of the setbacks we had been experiencing at that time in our careers.  Being visionaries, we sought after working with other people of vision, people who were “going places” and achieving things.  However, we were repeatedly accepting jobs with people who were the type that achieved their goals by being controlling and abusive to those that worked with them.  As a result, not only did we have to work harder to accomplish our goals, but it would eventually lead to the need to change from that environment due to the physical and emotional drains it created.  The fact was that their lack of character in their modes of operation made the accomplishing of our goals more difficult than was necessary.  We were advised to be discerning as to the personality and character of people before choosing to do business with them.

It is both a practical as well as a spiritual concept to be discerning.

Discerning the character of the people with whom you need to interact is practical; it can keep you from investing money with a con artist who is planning on stealing it.  It can keep you from getting into an abusive marriage.  It can prevent you from committing to projects that are either headed for failure or will create more trouble for you than it is worth.  Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

Those in abusive relationships frequently live in a state of confusion and hopelessness or blaming God for not helping them because they are unable to identify why continual destruction takes place in their lives.

Unfortunately, one is usually unaware of how his daily choices, lack of boundaries, and violating of spiritual and natural laws open the doors for harm to repeatedly come to him. Today I want to help you identify areas of your life that may be “opening the door” to harm in your circumstances and relationships. If you can begin seeing where you are violating spiritual boundaries or guidelines that God set up for your own protection, you can avoid the pitfalls, protect your life, and fulfill your destiny.

A person who continually faces destruction in his life often feels that he is being loving “like God” by giving in to controlling people and not having boundaries to protect his life and destiny.

This person often becomes bitter and blames God for the hardships he or she is suffering, but it is not God that has caused these things. God is not just “loving,” He IS Iove itself. There is a difference. He is perfect love and His perfect love includes boundaries, natural and spiritual laws, correction, and justice for the sake of our protection and well-being. To have real love and beneficial results in one’s daily life and relationships, you must implement God’s type of love, a real love that has boundaries and protection built into it.

A person would not blame God for self-imposed harm that came to someone who chose to violate the laws of nature. Yet, whether or not you implement spiritual laws for daily relationships is also a decision to avoid or cause self-imposed harm.

Here is an illustration. If someone chooses to violate the natural law of gravity by jumping off a skyscraper and bringing destruction to his or her physical body, you would not blame God for the result of their choice. God did not do it to them. The person chose to violate a natural law and it resulted in personal harm. God lists in Scripture many practical, daily guidelines (I’m going to call them spiritual laws as compared to laws of nature), which are given to help us be wise in our relationships with people, particularly those who are controlling or potentially harmful to us. People often violate these laws for one of three reasons:

–A lack of knowledge. They have never received instruction on the subject.

–They know about them but mistakenly feel that compromise is a loving choice because it is what the controlling person wants them to do.

–The person is so worn out by surrounding themselves with “leech” type people instead of giving people that they do not have the strength to fight for their personal rights, well-being, and fulfillment of destiny.

By stating the following spiritual guidelines as what should be avoided, it will be easier for you to identify if you already have violations of these spiritual guidelines affecting your relationships with people, and make changes necessary to bring restoration to your life. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

Whenever you set goals, the manifestation of the best goals-your goals for the ultimate restoration of your life-are achieved through a very common process: writing it out!

I recently mentioned to a friend about a common denominator that I came across while studying the success stories of people whose lives had endured complete collapse financially, physically, and career-wise. The recovery or life restoration of every person I have studied, both in the secular and religious worlds, resulted from a commitment to writing out a clear list of life goals. It sounds so simple. In many ways, it is. Yet it is absolutely vital to seeing the manifestation of your restoration. Whether the purpose of your goal setting is the complete restoration of a collapsed life, the reaching of some childhood dreams, or accomplishing your destiny, a clearly written list is still an absolute necessity.

This practical illustration reveals why the manifestation of your goals must go beyond just visualization.

Many people have probably seen the photos of the beach communities in Mississippi after Hurricane Katrina. The devastation looked must like that of an earthquake. Nothing could be seen for miles except complete rubble. Among those people who lost their homes, there was bound to be at least one architect or contractor.

An expert home builder may know all that there is to build himself a new home, but he will never begin the rebuilding without “writing it out,” without a blueprint. An expert builder who lost his home in that disaster may be able to see the image in his mind of the new home for the rebuilding, but he will not rebuild without that blueprint, without putting it in writing. And, to further the analogy, Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »