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We’re continuing our post on having the life you desire and the best year ever by being a better person.

This is Part 2 of a 2-Part post.  If you missed Part 1, please use the series link above.

This is a continuation of resolutions by Jonathon Edwards, a famous historical American, which focus on diligently improving his own person during the course of the year.  We are using them as examples for improving ourselves so that we will have a better year. As Jonathan Edward’s list of resolutions is in old English, I’m going to put the original quotes followed by a summary of my own in blue italics. 

22. Resolved, To endeavour to obtain for myself as much happiness in the other world as I possibly can, with all the power, might, vigor, and vehemence I am capable of, or can bring myself to exert, in any way that can be thought of.  More forceful than the earlier quote, it is a challenge to use extremely intense amounts of your energies and abilities to have a happy life, as opposed to pouring your energies into people or situations you cannot change.

24. Resolved, Whenever I do any conspicuously evil action, to trace it back, till I come to the original cause; and then, both carefully endeavor to do so no more… Often, we easily focus on other’s failures, especially those which negatively effect us. Be a better person this year by at least putting the same amount of energy, if not more, into changing you.  When you’ve done something obviously wrong, consider Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Examining how to be a better person is a key factor in having the better year that you desire.

In addition to creating a definite plan of goals and dreams for this new year, realizing specific ways to become a better person is an essential part of making this year better than any year in the past!

I came across a list of New Year’s resolutions by Jonathon Edwards which focus on diligently improving his own person during the course of the year.  As his list was extremely detailed, 70 resolutions in all, I’m picking out some for us to focus on, keeping the original numbers with them, and then providing a link below to the full list for those who want to read it in its entirety.  Edwards, a famous person in American history (1703-1758), was considered an intellectual, philosopher, and theologian. He was president of Princeton University at his death.

As Jonathan Edward’s list of resolutions is in old English, I’m going to put the original quotes followed by a summary of my own in blue italics.  This post is Part 1 of a 2-Part post.

5. Resolved, Never to lose one moment of time, but to improve it in the most profitable way I possibly can. Time is such a valuable gift; as we cannot get back a single moment of time lost, it will benefit you this year to keep in the forefront of your mind to make the most of every moment, treating it as the thing of infinite value that it is.

6. Resolved, To live with all my might, while I do live.  Similar to valuing each moment, endeavor to use all of your best abilities and energies to live this life and enjoy living it.

7. Resolved, Never to do any thing, which I should be afraid to do if it were the last hour of my life. This is a great way to improve one’s person. If you are faced with a choice Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Take a few moments to look at this example and write out the activities, people, and environment that will enable you to live your life with purpose.

[This is the second post in a series I ran a few years back, but the information is so vital to the essential mindset for beginning a new year that I wanted to bless your lives by bringing it back to your attention. 

If you missed Part 1 in which we discussed the list Ms. Markova's developed as an example on how to live life with passion and purpose, please click here .]

Here is my “No Matter Whats” List:

What are the influences, activities, and people that cause me to live life with energy, fulfillment, and purpose?

No matter what, I need to be living and working in a spacious environment that encourages my creativity and visionary side.

No matter what, I need to be living and working in an environment with garden and ocean views that fill my body with pleasure, health, and energy.

No matter what, I need to live a lifestyle that provides times for prayer, meditation, healthy eating, exercise, relaxation, and friendship so that my mind, spirit, and body are all equally healthy.

No matter what, I need to work privately as an author, but also outwardly, impacting the world, so that all nations of the earth are blessed through me. (Gen.12:3) Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Living with Purpose and Living Your Purpose

Do you feel that you are living the purpose for which your life exists and enjoying achieving it with passion?   Or do you feel that you are powerless, caught in a habitual life that you do not want?

[I ran this series of posts a few years back, but it is such an essential mindset for beginning a new year that I wanted to bless your lives by bringing it back to your attention.]

This past week my brother mentioned to me a book by Dawna Markova. He said she is known for encouraging people to surround themselves with the environment, people, and activities that bring energy into their lives, rather than drain energy from their lives. I have read articles by other authors on that topic, but none by Dawna, so I decided to Google her and find out more. Dawna Markova, Ph.D, is an internationally known speaker and author who encourages people to” learn from our wounds, find our gifts, celebrate our values, and live our dreams to live on purpose and with passion.” One of her most popular books is, “Wide Open: On Living With Purpose and Passion.” She has many other great sounding books, as well as a blog, which you can find at DawnaMarkova.com  .

I also came across an article of Ms. Markova’s called, “Landscape of the Soul.”  She has a great illustration of how one can be trapped in an unfulfilling life of habit. She tells of a science experiment in which baby fish were raised in a small glass tank that was inside a larger glass tank of adult fish. Once the baby fish were grown, the small tank was removed, but the baby fish still would not swim beyond the place where the walls of the small tank had once been. The habit was more real than reality, even though reality provided them with more freedom.

Are you living in a way that develops that best of who you are?

Ms Markova wisely instructs to give thought to the kind of environment you need to bring out the best of the person that you are so that, when you are in a needy, demanding environment, you will not lose Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

A couple of readers asked about health problems stemming from past hurts and how positive thinking brings healing, so let’s touch on both today!

There is an endless stream of little things happening everyday which can irritate you if you allow them to, but they are not even worth the negative thoughts and resulting physical consequences.

The first main point here is “little!” For most of us, it is allowing little situations to consistently irritate or worry us that ruin our health. Medical studies have shown that up to 80% of physical illnesses are caused by emotional issues. Some of us may be experiencing health problems due to living in an emotionally and/or physically abusive environment; if that is the case, health cannot come without a change “in” the environment or “of” environments. (If this is your case, please go to the Cloud Tag in the side column and click on “boundary violations” for posts to help you with that type of situation.) The majority of us, however, allow our health to be ruined by instances that actually come down to a matter of our own choice of thoughts. We can be the cause of our own poor health by allowing a multitude of small instances throughout the day to create irritation or anger or worry. Because we allow these negative responses so often, harmful chemicals such as cortisol are continually being released into our bodies. Studies show that cortisol, a chemical released by stress, increases irritability, depression, anxiety, insomnia, and is associated with numerous diseases (1).

The little things that set you off will vary with your personality. For example, what negative thoughts come to mind when:

• someone cuts you off in traffic?
• cuts you off to take the closest parking space?
• a family member spills something on the carpet or furniture?
• the kids start fighting?
• the dog had an accident in the house?
• a co-worker makes a cutting remark about you in front of other staff? Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

The results are in on a world-wide study examining the relationship between money and happiness. 

It is the biggest study of its kind, questioning 136,839 people, ages 15 and older in both cities and remote villages from 132 countries.  The study was designed to represent 96% of the world’s population. 

 See the footnotes at the end of the post for links to the full articles with these stats and excerpts.

Can You Discern Happiness Apart from Money?

Researchers say that a main difficulty in past studies on “money and happiness” was that people generally are unable to differentiate between money and happiness.  When asked if they are happy, people evaluate their lives by comparing their income and possessions with other peoples.’  The new study discovered that there is a crucial difference between money’s affect on overall life satisfaction versus one’s day-to-day emotional state.

The key elements to “happiness” or day-to-day positive emotions such as enjoyment, smiling, laughing, were universally shown to result from:

-feeling respected
-being in control of your life (freedom to choose daily activities) Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

How much do you live life in the present moment?  Or is your daily life a constant mental battle between past problems and future concerns?

I’ve mentioned that I’ve been reading again through Dr. Richard Carlson’s book, “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff.”  I wasn’t going to make another reference to it but then I came across the chapter on being present-minded or “living on purpose,” as author, Dawna Markova, also challenges.  The tendency to not live present-minded is such a wide spread mental trap that most people unknowingly fall into — one which literally steals the joy out of life — that I could not deprive you of the opportunity to discuss it again. 

Listen to this quote from Dr. Carlson which aptly describes not living a present-minded life:

We allow past problems and future concerns to dominate our present moments, so much so that we end up anxious, frustrated, depressed, and hopeless.  On the flip side, we also postpone our gratification, our stated priorities, and our happiness, convincing ourselves that “someday” will be better than today.  While we’re busy Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

Fear or anxiety left undealt with can quickly destroy one’s quality of life, causing lack of sleep, lowering of productivity on the job, stress in relationships, poor decision making, and countless physical ailments. 

This past Christmas, we gave out several copies of a book on the topic of overcoming fear to several co-workers. There were two different issues of the book, one dealing with the life fears of the average person, the other dealing with the additional fears particular to the family members of those in the military.  We received incredible feedback, to the extent that co-workers came looking for copies to give to family and friends.  The book had an unusual format, Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

Though most everyone is aware of the old expression, acting on it truly empowers your life.

Like the old expression of whether a glass is half full or half empty, how you daily perceive your life, as either half full or half empty, will determine whether you empower yourself to succeed and be happy or drain the very life force (energy-wise) from your day-to-day existence.

Grasping the urgency of this concept can be a key factor to restoration.

I have been recently talking with a friend who has not yet grasped the urgency of this concept in bringing restoration to his life.  He was in a very abusive family relationship. The controlling, self-motivated spouse lived a destructive lifestyle that deeply affected every member of that family. Eventually, even the children as they became adults began to adopt many of her user/abuser behavior traits. Eventually, my friend’s life came completely crashing down around him with the loss of his physical and emotional health, self worth, career, and financial stability. He has been out of the household for about 8 months, though career issues and financial problems caused by the relationship aren’t remedied by a geographic change. The effects from the amount of time – 20 years – in such a abusive relationship are not easily or quickly corrected. Yet, day after day, my friend beats himself down in his thoughts by focusing on what has not yet been restored, i.e. a healthy family setting, new career, and freedom from debt.

By focusing on the “half full” in his journey to restoration, my friend could be living in a state of joy that would bring energy, creativity, vision, motivation, and awareness of good opportunities to his daily life.

Those of us around him can rejoice in the tremendous healings that have visibly taken place: his physical health is doing well, his personality and sense of humor have returned, he has free time/personal time, he is now surrounded by people who deeply love and support him instead of drain him and abuse him. These aspects alone would bring great consolation to many people who are in situations needing improvement. It could to him, too, if he would only allow it.

The decision to focus on what is not yet resolved will drain the life force from anyone’s day, making difficult any type of effectiveness and clarity of perception. In addition, staying focused on the problem causes you to only see the problem, not the solutions.

Look at these examples of life benefits from focusing on the “half full.”

The decision to focus on the “half full” part of my friend’s life would: Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

Everyone wants to love and be loved; making some small changes can greatly improve your relationships and the quality of your love.

Richard Carlson, PhD, has perfected the art of quick, practical tips to improve your life with his “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff” series of books. His books have been bestsellers for years. He and his wife co-wrote “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff in Love.” I would recommend this book to anyone, even if you are single, as it will do wonders for your interpersonal relationships. See the ISBN in the footnotes to read his full book.

Here are a few easy-to-understand, easy to implement phrased points from Dr. Carlson’s book for improving the quality of your love:

1. Don’t Do the Same Things and Expect Different Results: That’s an old saying we are all familiar with but it is the same in love relationships. If you know you react negatively in certain situations — overreacting, lashing out, knee-jerk reactions — and then suffer disappointing and negative responses in return, you have to choose to use new responses that will bring healthy results.

2. Avoid Correcting Each Other: This point is not referring to an isolated incident but the habit of publicly correcting the person you love when it is absolutely unnecessary. It is disrespectful and damaging to the relationship. Are not the feelings of the person you love more important than technicalities? Most all people resent being corrected. Unless it is of extreme importance, keep the correction to yourself. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Gratifying

Is your life focus right now on the main problem area of your life?

What is that controlling area? A job, finances, marriage, other personal relationships, health? Though we must give attention to the problem area if it is going to improve, it is healthier and more effective to be focused on completeness or wholeness than give the totality of your attention to a problem.

Since the beginning of creation, God’s desire for mankind is to be complete.

At the beginning of creation, all was in perfection and harmony. Everything mankind needed was readily available. Yes, man’s rebellion brought devastation, but God still desires for your life to return to a state of wholeness or completeness, and so should you.

Look at this greeting out of Scripture:

1Sam. 25:6 And say this, “May all be well for you: peace be to you and your house and all you have.”

We are to speak the desire for all to be well in others’ lives; certainly, we should speak and desire it over our own lives.

Let’s take a more in depth look with this quote:

Jer.33:9 They will be in awe and will tremble at the abundant prosperity and peace I provide.

God speaks here of people being in awe, both mentally and physically at the prosperity and peace He provides for His people. Sounds simple, but, as I’ve mentioned before, much is lost in the translation to English. Look at the depth and expanse of completeness in life (or wholeness — whichever term is easier for you to envision) that is intended to be ours: Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

Do your efforts to maintain your self esteem cultivate an environment of self worth or defeat for those around you?

Some of the most difficult people with whom to maintain healthy long-term relationships are those who feel that every conflict of opinion is an opportunity to prove that they are “right,” rather than come to a mutual understanding of other people’s points of views. Every disagreement instantly puts them into a “challenge to win” mode, which, unfortunately for the people in the relationships around them, means someone else must first lose. Another person is never allowed to have a different way of doing something because this person’s way is always better, as far as he or she is concerned. We cannot always avoid this type of person, as they may be a required part of the environment at work, home, or other frequented social settings. Today, however, let’s look at this in a more personal way.

Ask yourself, “Am I the type of person whose determination to always win produces an environment of defeat for other people?” Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Impassioned

We each go through times in life in which peace of mind is a little more of a struggle to maintain.

As I was going through journal notes this morning from the past several months, I came across several quotes on peace that I thought I’d share with you. This is an unusual type of post for this blog. My desire is that these points will help to solidify your peace of mind when fear tries to rob it. Following most quotes, I’ll have some comments to ensure the steps for attaining peace are as clear as possible.

Peace of Mind Begins by Your Communication with God Controlling Your Thought Life.

Col. 3:15 Let the peace of Christ continually act as umpire in your hearts, settling with finality all questions that arise in your minds…and be thankful, giving praise.

God encourages us in this quote to allow His peace to umpire the fearful thoughts that battle in your mind. When faced with fear, one has a choice to let the fears in his mind run rampant, or allow God’s peace to put those questions and fears to rest with finality. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

There is no need to stay stuck in the misery of a bad day.

I cam across a very practical, helpful article by psychologist and life coach Melissa McCreery with tips to move on from the guilt, anger, hurt, or frustrations of a bad day and get back to the peace and productivity of a positive mindset.

Ms. McCreery says that the secret to thriving is learning how to move forward in spite of bad days.

Here are some excerpts of from Melissa’s article, “How to Recover from a Bad Day:”

1. Give yourself permission to have a bad day. Stop beating yourself up so that you can move on. Let go of blame and guilt, realizing that a bad day does not mean you failed.

2. Ask, “What will I need to let go of to do move on?” You must be willing to stop beating yourself up, feeling miserable (or hurt or angry), drowning your sorrows, or feeling victimized.

3. Decide what do you want to move on TO?   How do you want things to be? How do you want to feel? What do you want your mindset or mental attitude to be?

4. Take a look in the mirror at your posture and facial expressions; make sure you aren’t still carrying your bad day with you. Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »

Reading Level: Leisurely

 What emotions do you experience when you think of your future?

Take a look at this self-evaluation quote from “8 Steps to Create the Life You Want:”

Have you ever wondered what your purpose in life is and what your future holds?…Picture your life twenty years from now. Does your current lifestyle predict that you will be happy and fulfilled, or disappointed and frustrated? Think about it. What does your bank account look like? How much retirement money have you set aside? How much debt do you owe? What are you doing to improve your health and well-being? How is your family really doing? The answers to these questions may be an indication that a few changes need to be made.(1)

Were the emotions you experienced from reading these questions positive or negative? Immerse Yourself in the Full Healing Contemplation Here »